Thursday, October 21, 2010

Guest Blog Post #4

Here is an insightful and funny piece from Denise Swank. Please enjoy it and you can find her Twitter handle and blog addy at the end of it:

Socially Savvy

Social media is revolutionizing the world. Facebook and Twitter are ways to reach out into the world and connect with target audiences. But what about reaching a closer audience? Like your children?

It's a well known fact teenagers are repulsed at the idea of having an actual conversation. You only have to observe two teens sitting side by side sending each other texts to know this is true. But having a conversation with their mother? Shudder. Yet, we parents need to stay in tuned with our kids, so what are we supposed to do? Tap into their preferred communication technique.

Text messaging.

Lucky for my children, I am social media savvy. (I really want to insert an evil laugh here, yet I will refrain.)

My teens have cell phones, but the rule is if they don’t answer my phone call or text, they better have a REALLY good reason. Like they were driving. Or they were attacked by killer bees. Or they were under general anesthesia donating a kidney to buy my birthday gift.

Last Friday, my 8th grade daughter, Julia, went to the high school football game with friends. I told her to text me when her friend’s mother was bringing them home. What followed was deeply moving, bonding experience between mother and daughter.*

Julia: We’re on our way home

Me: Did you win?

Julia: No, we lost. The other team kicked the ball thru some posts at the end

Me: A field goal?

Julia: You know what a field goal is? Did they have football when you were in school?

Me: Of course. Back in those days we used T Rex bladders for balls. The Brontos' bladders were too big.


Julia: Oh! Abby thought you were funny

Me: See??? I keep telling you I’m funny.

Julia: No, Mom. No

Abby (to me): Ms. Denise you were funny

Julia (to me): Stop you are embarrassing me

Me (to Julia): What about Muffy? All my readers thought she was funny. (flatulent dog from my novel)

Julia: No, Mom

Me: :-P”””

Julia: Huh?

Me: It’s a face! With a tongue hanging out, spitting.

Julia: ?

Me: It’s a VERY sad day when a mother teaches her 13 y/o daughter an emoticon.

Julia: Oh Mom

Abby (to me): that was funny

Julia (to me): MOM!

Me: X-(

Julia: I don’t get it

Me: It’s an angry face. Turn it sideways.

Abby (to me): I see it! That's cool!

Julia (to me): Mom, stop, my friends think you are funny

Me: Oh, the horror! Did you have fun?

Julia: Yeah

Me: Any cute boys?

Julia: MOM! STOP!

(Car pulls into driveway. Julia comes into the house.)

“Now you’ve done it. My friends think you’re cool.” Julia mumbled when she walked in the house.

“Is that a bad thing?”

She gave me a dramatic eye roll as she left the room.

Is there an emoticon for that?

*This text conversation may have been slightly exaggerated for entertainment purposes.

When not tormenting her children, Denise can be found on Twitter as @DeniseMSwank or on very rare occasions, lurking on her own blog


  1. I'm glad to see you're doing your duty as a mother by embarrassing your daughter. Job well done. :)

    And because this is one of your favorites x-(

  2. Love it! They're so lucky. You ARE funny!

  3. This is hilarious. I especially liked the drooling emoticon. You're an awesome mom. :)

  4. My daughter's too young for this-I have to settle for torturing my 17 yr old nephew on FB . . .